Case Study: What's your reason to Quit?

Before I came to be a full-time coach, speaker and workshop facilitator, I started my career as a therapist specializing in addictions and mental health issues. One of my favorite challenge was to help people overcome the smoking addiction. I quit smoking myself at age 25 and I understood just how terribly hard it is - but also that it was possible.

Suffice it to say, I was pleased when one of my coaching clients came out of the closet and revealed to me he was a smoker. He believed that his doctor was getting ready to put the kabash on his smoking, and he asked if I could help him. Sure! I had so many tips for him. There are hundreds of books, programs, websites and apps out there, all with very helpful tips, tools, techniques and information about quitting smoking. But none of that matters, in my opinion, until you have taken the first step.

This first step is to find your why for becoming a non smoker. You are not just stopping a habit, you are transforming yourself into another person, into a person who does not smoke. This is serious business and you must have a compelling reason – a purpose, your own special motivation beyond the doctor telling you to quit. Do you want to smell good so that your girlfriend wants to kiss you? Do you want to feel proud about overcoming this habit? Are you tired of huffing and puffing? Do you want to save thousands of dollars and put it toward your kids’ education, a vacation, a downpayment on a house?

My reason was this: I wanted to know what I was feeling. After a lot of self-exploration, I realized that every time I had a cigarette there was an emotion I was numbing, and I wanted to learn more about my feelings and actually feel them! Essentially, I was done running away from my feelings and turning toward caring about myself and learning to love myself.

This reason helped me in challenging times through my quit period which was about a year. I had a bigger purpose to orient to when I was going through withdrawal and ready to cave. I think our brains really need for a bigger purpose to help you through these momentary cravings. Orienting to the purpose then drives you to use all the tips, tools and techniques of quitting.

My client tried many, many things to stop: medications, nicotine gum, cold turkey willpower, replacing it with food, replacing it with exercises. This went on for many years and he had bouts of not smoking, but it wasn’t until he looked deeper and came up with a compelling reason (none of the other reasons were compelling enough), he wasn’t able to stop.

He is now 3 years free from smoking and so proud of this big accomplishment - he says it was one of the hardest things he has ever done in his life and proud to share with his daughter when she is old enough to understand that he did this to be a role model for her.

Are you looking to quit smoking? If so…what’s your reason?